I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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