I wanna bring you to show and tell
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
either way he was missing a nipple.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Cover your peen. We're going out.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
