Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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