love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
