Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
