So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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