you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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