But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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