I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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