I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
