he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
