At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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