just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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