today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
