p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I need to calm my uterus...
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize