they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
