She's JV to your varsity
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
