That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize