I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
