The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
