you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize
