i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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