dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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