I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Please don't give away my fajitas
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
