when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
The air taste purple.
Randomize
