please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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