butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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