she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
