It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
