Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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