if we break up, who will get the dealer?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
