I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
