Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
he fucked my hip out of place.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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