sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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