So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize