i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
