I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
