At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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