So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
