You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
