every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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