When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
If I die, sorry about rent.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
