if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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