its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
