You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
drinking out of a sandbucket again
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
