A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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