You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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