I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
