...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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