carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
